Am I Really a Sugar Addict?

Am I really an addict?

Just to make it clear, for many years I considered myself a Carbohydrate and sugar addict.

But just recently I have become aware that sometimes I enjoy certain foods. And perhaps I need to be kinder to myself. However, there is more behind the addiction than meets the immediate attention. So for example, an addict to alcohol may never be able to have just that one drink. Or the drug addict can never have just the one fix.

The word addict is used commonly in the 21st Century, and I am beginning to think that it just may be too common.

Let’s start with the Wikipedia description of addiction.

Addiction is a brain disorder characterised by compulsive engagement in rewarding stimuli despite adverse consequences.

The most frequent addictions and those who do the most harm, because they affect people around them too, leading to crime for the individual who needs their fix; are alcohol, drugs and gambling.

But we now use the word addiction to many other things. Such as sugar, food, internet games and so on.

But do you think that there are certain words that have become distorted from their true meaning? Are we giving the name to certain behaviours that are really quite harmless, and is only a desire for something nice, particularly for certain foods or our favourite computer game. Is the word addiction becoming overused?

I know that addiction can begin with not just liking something, but finding that it gives us a high, and we are more aware now of making sure that we don’t become addicted to certain activities. Even reading books has become something to be wary of. How often do you hear people say that they are addicted to reading, running, walking, exercise, and many healthy and useful activities?

Words can mean different things to different people.

Take the word “Diet”.  It simply means eating regime. So we are all on a diet!  But this word has now taken on negative connotations. Because we now know that slimming diets are futile, and we need to simply change our eating habits.

Now don’t get me wrong. I have written a lot about “not dieting”. I have three books on the subject on Amazon Kindle. And there are many blogs about it on my website. http://www.patriciacherrylifecoach.com.

I am the first to say that dieting is futile and that healthy eating for a lifetime is the best way to go. But the point I am making here is that we have made “diet” almost a dirty word.

So I wonder whether we are doing the same with the word addiction?

Are we too worried that behaviour, or liking something means that we are becoming an addict?

Let me give you an example.

Recently a friend said to me that she has started to have a scone in the afternoon for her tea. And followed this with the words “I’m becoming addicted to them.”

Then a few days later the same friend said to me that I (meaning me) am becoming addicted to oatcakes. That was because she had heard me say often lately that I love humous and oatcakes and often have that for my lunch.  But it was my reaction that startled me. I immediately went on the defensive and said that actually I had made the packet last a month!

Why did I do that?

Because I have been struggling with addictive behaviour around food all of my life, and now that I consider that I am mostly in control (another word that has negative connotations for addicts and dieter alike) I felt that she was being unfair and insinuating that I was an addict. But her remark was not meant to be derisory.

I see a society that is making us into victims, using the word addict to control our behaviour. We stop kids from enjoying games on the computer because we fear addiction. (I do believe that needs to be limited of course, but we need to think more about why.)

We are beginning to feel guilty if we eat cake in public. And many find themselves using words such as good, bad or too much cholesterol, or worry that they are becoming addicted.

We are still in the grip of not eating saturated fat, and the biggest sellers in supermarkets are still low-fat products. Even though it was proved two years ago that it is not harmful unless processed. Natural yoghurt, butter, olive oil, and other saturated fats are good for us. But in my generation, there are many sick people who lived on low-fat products for a very long time in the belief that they were doing the right things. Better to eat the grey, dull, so-called healthy margarine than butter which tastes good and does you good.

But I digress. I wonder how many of us deprive ourselves of the occasional treat of cake or a scone because we fear addiction.

After a lifetime of dieting, and feeling guilty over eating certain foods, and fearing that people will think I am an addict, I have been pondering recently about whether I really am an addict to certain foods, or whether I simply like them.

I must admit though that I need to watch myself. Because the occasional treat comes around to more than just occasional, I easily pile on the pounds. But, is that really addiction? Or do I just need to be more careful?

I haven’t got the answer of course, because I still have to control what foods I have in the house because I know for sure that sooner or later I would eat them all. Probably in one go!

But I count myself Free. That means that I have learnt what freedom really means.  If I want a scone when I am out, I have one. If I need painkillers to dull the constant pain of Fibromyalgia, I will take them. If my husband needs strong painkillers at times, it is a comfort to both of us that we have the ones that work.

I might reiterate here about the advice we have been given down through the years about what foods are good or bad for us. The debacle with eggs twenty years ago led people to believe that they should not have more than two eggs a week. That was eventually disproved.

We all know the one about red wine and how the advice changes from day to day in the press.

Cholesterol is also a sworn enemy.  But did you know that the body needs cholesterol?  It is our friend. And no, it won’t be controlled by diet. Yet we have been conned into believing that we should keep the levels down. But the older you are, the higher your cholesterol is naturally. It is the body’s way of healing. Yet authorities are hell-bent on making even the frailest of us keeping our cholesterol levels down.

In case you are wondering why I say this, listen to Zoe Harcombe talking about it. She was the woman who wrote the paper three years ago, on Saturated fat, and led to a lot of media cover about Butter not being harmful.

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&v=s3lFH4_Ws7A

And what does Society use to make us believe all this? Fear! Pure and simple. And the word Addict is a very useful tool for them.

So am I an addict?  Well up to now I have said that I am, but now I believe that I simply love refined carbohydrates, but I need to limit the amount that I eat.

I also love games such as Colour by Numbers, and also Solitaire on my computer. Recently I have been playing them and listening to audio-books at the same time. But all that means is that I have a desire to do that to help me relax. I just need to be careful that I do not spend more time than is sensible, to prevent me from doing the other things that I love.

So, perhaps we need to be aware of how much we deny ourselves the things we desire, by worrying about becoming an addict.

But please don’t see this as carte blanche for having anything you want, to the detriment of your wellbeing. I am only sharing my thoughts, not teaching!

If you want to know more about the way to find what diet suits you as an individual, try this;

design your own diet https://patriciacherrylifecoach.com/2014/09/07/design-diet-toolbox/

 

A Heretic?

 

A Heretic?

I have not written a blog now for some time, but today I feel from the soul that I need to write this.

Am I a heretic?

I have written a book called The Truth Has Set Me Free, and there has been a delay in publishing, for many reasons, the most recent one being that God knew that there was a Post-script to be added.

And now, I have just finished reading a book called Beneath a Heretic’s Wings.

In The Truth Has Set Me Free I share the experience of growing up in a Pentecostal Fundamentalist family and church. And how that upbringing in no way prepared me for what was to come in later life.

An outcast?

I always felt an outcast. I never felt like one of them while in the church, yet was afraid to say anything or leave. On the other hand, neither did I feel at home in the other world because I had been taught that I was separated from other people because I was “Saved”. That I had given my heart to the Lord and therefore I was better than everyone else.

The book “Beneath a Heretics Wings,” is written by two women who were right there in the path of the persecution handed out to a man called Carlton Pearson, who is featured in the Netflix film, Come Sunday.

He is a Pentecostal Bishop in the USA, and until the year 2001 went along with the teaching that there is a hell and only those who are “Saved” would not go there.

To quote Carlton’s words, “The whole world is saved, they just don’t know it.”

He believes from the heart that we are all saved. That God loves everybody, no matter what race, creed, religion, belief or otherwise. And that a loving God is not going to send anyone to Hell.

I first came across his book with the long title GOD is not a Christian, nor a Jew, Muslim, Hindu ….. and with the subtitle, God dwells with Us, in Us, Around Us, as Us.

He has also written a book explaining his convictions, called The Gospel of Inclusion.

I had already started writing my book The Truth, and Carlton’s words blew my mind and my heart.

Where is the love of God?

Now two years later I have just finished Beneath a Heretic’s Wings. And I am shocked at the testimony of these two women, who stood by him, Cassandra L. McLellan and Teresa L. Reed. The way that the Pentecostal Church treated Carlton and those who stayed with him was abysmal.

I am shocked that Christian people could not show the love that God has for themselves, and yet they could not share it with someone who had the guts to speak out. He was a Pastor of a church of Five thousand or so people, and after being cast out, was preaching to one hundred and fifty people. He lost everything, including friends and money. But he never lost his love of God, or anybody else.

And he was accused of being a Heretic and a False Prophet.

He has now slowly recovered, and is gracious, forgiving and loving to everyone, and is preaching the Gospel of Inclusion – everyone is included in God’s love, and not just those who are “saved”. You can see him on YouTube.

Time to be authentic

So, I have decided that it is time for me to speak out.  I am aware that when my book The Truth Has Set Me Free comes out, there will be some who are dismayed that I seem to have given up my faith. I have already had a close friend and a cousin who have written to me about my lost eternity (another way of describing Hell). Their emails are preachy, and they believe that only what the Bible says is right.

They forget that the word ‘hell’ is rarely seen in the Bible. And that if I or anyone else wants to prove a point, they can always find something in it to support their point. That is the secret of the Bible and why it has always been a best seller. And may I say; why it has always been an inspiration to so many. I thank God that I live in an age, where we can check it out and not just listen to what we hear from the pulpit, both in the history of how it was written and the content. Something that we all need to do.

Time to be of courage

The book Beneath a Heretic’s Wings has made me realise that it takes some courage to be a Heretic, but if that is what I am in certain people’s eyes, then so be it.

Heretics in days gone by were killed, burnt at stake, tortured and so on. So I must admit that I don’t know if I would have been brave enough to be one in those circumstances. But in the 21st Century there is a Spiritual shift, and I am glad that I am part of it.

There will be more blogs to come of this nature, and there will also be a Facebook group based on The Truth.  I do not claim to know all the answers, but I know that The Truth for me has been a wonderful, soul experience. It has changed me, I am always at peace, even when I become distressed, or depressed, or seemed to have got something wrong (depending on who’s eyes are judging that last one).

One of my specialist subjects on my Website, blogs, and Facebook groups is “Ageing With Vitality” so I was particularly interested when I came across this quote from The Gospel of Inclusion.

“The first thing that goes when you begin to think is your theology. If you stick too long to a theological point of view, you become stagnant with no vitality.”  OSWALD CHAMBERS

patricia cherry lifrecoach

That is so true, because just listening to the preacher and not studying and finding out for yourself, is a cop-out. I have been studying and researching for myself for the last twenty-five years or so, and have come to see the Truth for myself.  And what is more, I will continue to be openminded, loving and accepting of people from all backgrounds, and all belief systems. And I will give them the respect that I hope they will give to me.

Therein lies the peace of God

I know for sure that I am free from all the trappings of the fear of hell, and not being good enough. And I am loved by God.

Do you sometimes wonder whether you are a heretic?  Or perhaps you may still want to be a Christian, but don’t want all the trappings of an old doctrine that has misrepresented what a true Christian can be.

Have a look at this.

https://johnpavlovitz.com/2016/10/21/the-kind-of-christian-i-refuse-to-be/?utm_campaign=coschedule&utm_source=facebook_page&utm_medium=John+Pavlovitz&fbclid

I think that I fall somewhere in between. But does it really matter? That is what the Gospel of Inclusion is all about.

I’d love to hear your comments. But please refrain from preaching at me. We are all in this together.

More about The Truth Has Set Me Free.

 

 

In the next few weeks, my book “The Truth Has Set Me Free” will be published.

Although I recently posted a synopsis about it, I thought that perhaps I could add a few more thoughts.  So here goes.

Many of you have seen that synopsis that I sent out on the week beginning 15th October 2018, and there has been a great response to it, with many pre-orders coming in.  For which I thank you.

Firstly a little more about what the book is about and not.  I have had one response from a person who said that they would not want to read the book if it is a rant about the Pentecostal church. It is not. What it is, however, is the story of how the teachings of Christian fundamentalism, including other denominations, damaged my judgements and my self-image, right up until the age of forty. And how these poor judgements had dire consequences. Resulting in Divorce, bankruptcy and succumbing to two con men.

I take sole responsibility for those bad decisions and do not in any way blame the church. The story is all about forgiveness and love, both for myself and for those people in my life, who may have hurt me.

Just like anyone else in this human experience, I had choices. There are many people who are happy with the teachings of those churches, and I will not say who is right and who is wrong. Just like me, they have a choice.

Secondly, it is a picture of my childhood in the forties and fifties. I grew up in Cornwall and Devon in the UK.  At this time, the UK, as well as other countries, were still recovering from the second-world-war, and there was a tremendous sense of lack. But we had freedom and the countryside was not so far away as it is these days with towns and cities expansion.

I describe the games we played and the many hours of enjoyment exploring the woods and fields, And I also describe the mischief I got up to which got me into a lot of trouble.

Jumping ahead to my teens, that freedom was curtailed. Thanks to misunderstandings and my Mothers and the church I belonged to at the time, intransigence and being influenced by what I see as narcissistic teachings, which the family adhered to in every way.

Then I became a very young bride, and at the age of nineteen moved away from home to a new city. Because I had been taught that the world was a nasty, frightening place and I should keep away from it, I was very naïve. And unprepared for real life. I became homesick, depressed and began bingeing on food for comfort.

These feelings were to stay with me until the age of forty or so. Then at a very difficult time in my life, someone said to me “You need to ask yourself, who is Trish and where is she going?”  At the age of seventy plus now, I am still evolving, but can see more clearly that I am good enough and that is one reason why I wrote: “The Truth Has Set Me Free.”

Since becoming a Life coach and studying what makes people tick, I have seen what had been amiss in my life. But life had changed for the better after a divorce, loss of all my worldly possessions and a new marriage, to a well-read man.

The point of the book is that I want people to understand that they can change. And with that change comes new perception.

It is now twelve months since my Mother died, and I finished the book a few months later, having had new insights into why my Mother had been so myself unhappy in life.

Since then I have not only done more reading and learning, I have applied the truth to my life and freed myself up from the bounds of depression, bingeing on food and the feeling of abandonment and not being good enough.

At the time of writing, I am taking care of my husband as he ages and succumbs to vagaries of illness and ageing. And I can do it with joy and compassion, thanks to the grace and love that I know flows through me. And knowing that the past is in the past, and I am truly living in the present, in the “Now”.

I would like you to read this book with an open mind, remembering what I said here about love and forgiveness. I do not have any bitterness or issues with anyone who chooses whatever beliefs or teachings they want to, except in the case where they impose those beliefs onto others.

The Dalai Lamma once said that doing that is a form of abuse.

If you want to read the book, and own a signed copy, please would you support me by making a Pre-order. This means that I will send you one the moment I receive them from the publisher. You can do this by bank transfer, Pay Pal or cheque.  The amount is £10 Please email me or contact me on Private Messaging on Facebook. trishcherry734@gmail.com

Food Dogma. Are You What You Eat?

It seems to me that there is a new type of food dogma happening in the realm of what we eat.

What we should, and should not eat is becoming the new religion.

But hey!  How did this happen?

Food Dogma and Babies

food dogmaLet’s take a newborn baby. In an ideal world, breastfeeding is best. And these days, that is where it starts.  The mother has a decision to make in the modern age, whether to breastfeed or not. There can be many reasons why not, physically, and mentally, and yet, straight away she is made to feel guilty if she can’t or won’t.

This is the first step on the road to food dogma: facing the criticism of those who believe that every baby should be breastfed.

Food Dogma and Toddlers

As the child grows, Mother tries to give it the best foods that she can. From books and magazines, she is told that babies and toddlers need lots of fruit and vegetables. Don’t give them too much sugar, don’t add salt, and on and on. Don’t do this and don’t do that.

If they are lucky, they may have a child who prefers fruit and vegetables to other foods. Yes; it is possible, I have two grandchildren who did that. But the chances are that as they get a little older, they begin to be exposed to sugar and processed foods and even limit what they eat to just one or two main foods. This often means they are living on nothing but chicken nuggets and chips, or cheesy chips.

Again, the Mother is shamed because seemingly her child is not being nourished properly.

Schools

We live in a world that is now dominated by the big food consortiums, who infiltrate schools, hospitals, and community centres at large. So when the child begins school they see other children eating the “wrong” foods and start to be fussy about what is in their packed lunch.

Yes, I know, schools these days are trying hard to ban certain foods, and that is a marvelous move on their parts. But then we have the birthday parties and private outings with other children, and away we go.

We could make the child the victim of what we believe they should eat, and put them in embarrassing situations. But is that good for the child? The balance between that embarrassment and the right foods (as far as the parent is concerned) is a very narrow line.

Ok, so now let’s step forward into the future of that child. It may or may not grow up with the right idea of what it should eat. Then, lo and behold, it becomes a teenager. Need I say more?

Adults with Hangups?

As adults we begin to be more independent, travel, leave home, get married and so on.  All of these bring about necessary adaptations to what we eat.

Many, myself included, find that they have put on weight at some time.

Let me briefly share my story at this point.

At the age of nineteen, I had already married and left home, having married a sailor. I was two hundred miles away. My parents weren’t even on the phone, let alone the fact that there were no mobile phones. I could only communicate with them by letter.

So two factors led to me quickly putting on weight. Loneliness, with my husband being away at sea, and the fact that I was free from the food restrictions that were in place at home with my parents. So the GP immediately put me on a diet, when he saw me. (In those days, one stone overweight was too much!)

Yo-yo Dieting

Thus began forty-odd years of yo-yo dieting. Bingeing and fasting alternately. People who binge eat enormous amounts of sugary, processed carbohydrates. And that is what I did. Especially stodgy bread, cakes and mashed potato in vast amounts.

So, I developed an eating disorder, Bulimia. Which then built up a Food Intolerance. I won’t go into more detail, but I became intolerant to Wheat and Dairy products.

My Cure

The cure for me has been a diet of meat, fish, poultry, some fruit, vegetables, eggs and a little rice or quinoa. I can have quite a variety of enjoyable recipes on the go, and feel well on them. If I slip up, however, and think that I can get away with it, sooner or later I suffer. I put on weight, and have a bloated stomach, nausea and a great deal of discomfort.

Whose Choice?

On the other hand, there are many who find that they do not want or cannot eat meat. So become Vegetarian or Vegan.

But somehow or other, there is a lot of food dogma coming from people who seem to believe that what they eat, is the only way, whether they are Carnivores, Vegetarians or Vegans.

This dogma comes from many places. Every day there is an item in the media about food that may be contaminated, food that is good or bad for us. Anything to make a good article for the journalist writing it.

Where years ago we had preachers from the pulpit telling us that what they believe is how we should live or think. (Yes there are still many of them around.) They have been replaced by foodies.

More Tolerance Please?

Can we please have some tolerance, kindness and understanding about other people’s predicaments?

What if we stop judging the Obese and blaming them, when it is because of the wrong advice they have had from Dieticians and authorities over the last thirty years, with the “Don’t eat fat, eat carbohydrates” or “Eat less, move more”.

Can we stop judging the Mums and Dads who have to give in and let their child have a snack while they are doing their shopping?

How about we stop claiming that the way we eat is the only way?

Can we stop being dogmatic about any kind of food, and allow people to make up their own minds about what they eat? Which means that they eat what feels right for their body and keeps them fit and healthy. Everyone is different.

I believe and know for sure, that what we do need is better education in what to eat and how to cook nutritious meals. Right from when we start school.

Moderation

I also believe that the old fashioned saying, “Eat everything in moderation” is a good basis for health. 

But what we do not need is this focus on what other people are eating, without knowing why.

There have been many diets over the years, and the creators always claim that their diet is best. High fat/low carb; No mixing carbs and fats; No meat; High Protein; far too many to write about here.

Interestingly; There has never been a study as far as I know of very old people’s diet!  So who is to say that it is what they eat that gives them longevity? I have worked at length with Elders, and have seen a vast array of foods that are consumed by them. 

You can explore food issues further in articles on this site Blog

 

Do You Really Need to Lose Weight

 

Birthday Blog. Wizzdom. The Truth Has Set Me Free

On my birthday this year, I can truly say that “The Truth Has Set Me Free.”

Life in my older years is proving to be the very best ones of my time on Planet Earth. I am healthy; I am living in Abundance, I am loved, and I am full of the joy and peace that passes all understanding.

Like everyone else, I do have adversity and challenges along the way, and at times I doubt and fear. But I know for certain that everything is here to help me. And underneath it all, I know that the Universe has my back.

I have my new book coming out very soon now. Publishing a book is a long drawn out process, but I promise that it will be here in the next couple of months.

“The Truth Has Set Me Free” (the illustration above has one word change, because its a draft copy of the cover) is a story of how I was brought up in a Christian Fundamentalist faith. It describes my upbringing in the fifties, my engagement and first marriage at the tender age of sixteen and nineteen respectively.

There was fun as a child, and that fun is described in the book, including the games we played and the physical freedom of children in the nineteen fifties.

But as I got into my early teens, life became lonely and experienced an isolation which lasted for many years.

I describe how the fundamental upbringing had affected two previous generations. Which resulted in heartache, narcissism and for myself late adolescence at the age of forty, having not had one as a teenager.

The truth for me has come about since I saw the light at the age of forty, which like many other women, was followed by Divorce. But I was also conned out of thousands of pounds because of my naivety, became bankrupt and lost everything I had ever accumulated, including a large business, houses, my dogs and furniture.

But the fact that everything is sent to help us is so true. I met a wonderful man, who became my second husband, and he set me on the road to learning. In the last twenty-six years since I met him, I have developed a thirst for knowledge. Part of my upbringing was that knowledge was not important. The main aim in life was to be saved and get to Heaven which carried on into my first marriage and becoming totally immersed in those beliefs. That meant that many books that threatened to reveal anything other than the teaching in those churches were banned.

Then in 2011 at the age of 67, I studied at University to become a Life coach.  The learning there opened up a whole new way of seeing life.

All along, the Truth was setting me free from the bondage of the past, and the chains that had bound me to the belief that I was not good enough.

Now, I have reached a point in my life that is another transition. From the rush and pressure of being the best, and having to work at it, I can now trust wholly in the Divine.

Just before I left any established church, I had what I realise now was a light bulb moment, when I told other Christians, that the teachings of the church limited God. I realised that God was the Universe and everything around us. But fundamentalist belief attempted to trap God into a set of beliefs, a building, a set of people who thought they knew better than anyone else. Most of all that only Christians and “Saved” ones at that; could inherit the Kingdom. They taught and still do, that there is an Apocalypse coming and only Christians would be saved from that because they would be taken up into the air to meet the Saviour. Known as the Second Coming.

If you don’t know what I am talking about, I should give it a miss!

What I know to be the Truth, is what I had said then, without all the knowledge that I have accumulated since then. There has had to be a lot of forgiveness on my part, both for others, and myself.

The book has taken me over two years to write, and in the last year, the end of the book took on a life of its own, describing my Mothers death and how my brother and myself at long last understood why she had such an unhappy life.

Simply because she had never allowed herself to be loved, both by God and her beloved husband, my Dad. And in turn us and anyone else who wanted to show any compassion for her in her last days. She never understood that; We are all one; we are all part of God; we are all equal; we can all become conscious of those facts, and we are all loved. That love is a vital force; stronger than faith or hope.

We are all created to be the person we are, without having to be saved again by the same being who created us.

God is bigger than having to send someone to die, to correct the mistake he made when he created humans.

I have not accumulated a fortune; I do not live in a mansion, I don’t even own a car. But I feel as if I have riches beyond measure.

I feel quite amused now when I hear people who already have more than enough money say; When I win the lottery I will ………………………………….

I feel as if I have won more than the lottery. Because I know the Truth and it has set me free.

By the way, you may be wondering why the new word “Wizzdom” is included in the title of this blog. It is my new brand name, to cover all the hats I wear in supporting people. My specialities are; Weight and Food Management, Ageing with Vitality, Facilitating end of life planning and I am a Funeral Celebrant. I think that word “Wizzdom”, suggested by a friend, just about covers the wisdom I have gained over a lifetime of experiences and adventures in living.

 

Do you really need to lose weight?

Before you embark on any programme for losing weight, it is worth while asking yourself why?

Once you decide that you are in no doubt that you want or need to lose, and you are not just jumping on the proverbial bandwagon of not accepting and loving yourself, the next step is to make an intent. But we shall talk about that in another article.

There are many reasons why people want to lose weight. Among them are the following:

  • Vanity
  • Peer pressure.
  • Celebrity worship.
  • A special occasion
  • Your own wedding
  • Modelling or dancing
  • You are obese or really overweight
  • You just want to have a flat belly
  • Post baby fat.
  • Post illness or surgery

 

 

 

Read on and consider which ones you think apply to you.

 

VANITY   

Do you look at yourself in the mirror and wish you were seven pounds or so lighter?

 

  1. Are you being realistic about this?

 

  1. Have you ever been 7lbs lighter than you are today?

 

  1. If so, how long ago was it?

 

  1. Do you have two sets of clothes, one each of the bearing of the 7lbs, or its absence when you have starved it off?

 

  1. Will being 7lbs lighter help with all other problems in your life? If so, which ones are they?

 

  1. Would you really be healthier? Would the 7lbs less help with such things as arthritis, for instance?

 

  1. How would you plan to lose the 7lbs?

 

  1. What are your plans for your future eating habits, when you have lost it?

 

 

PEER PRESSURE

In this day of television, magazines and social networks, it is becoming more common for girls even at the age of ten to be looking at themselves and asking their friends if they are fat.  Recently I was with a thirteen-year old in a restaurant, asking her mother how many calories were in a particular food on the menu.  She has taken on board the message that to have a rounded womanly body is unacceptable.

Young girls talk endlessly about what they look like in a particular outfit, fretting more about whether it makes them look fatter than the colour or style.  A lot of damage is done through peer pressure, and a lot of misinformation is handed out too!

People suffering from eating disorders, such as Anorexia or Bulimia often begin their problems by worrying about calories.  But losing weight by counting calories is a myth and this subject will be covered in more detail later in the book.

Consider how much you allow other people to influence what size you think you should be.

 

 

 

CELEBRITY WORSHIP

Nearly every day newspapers or magazines feature a celebrity who has either put on or lost weight.  Too much on or too much off.   Do you think it is fair that these celebrities have to live their lives forever having to worry about being caught on camera and personal details about their bodies discussed by all?  Sometimes it can just be the camera angle.  Or a certain look on their faces and the camera has caught something that the journalist interprets the wrong way.  But it sells papers, and that is the excuse they give time and time again!

What is so tragic about this is that people are taken in, especially young girls and increasingly young men too.  In June 2012, there was a story about a fourteen-year old girl who had committed suicide.  She had developed Bulimia and even though she was beautiful, she had been worried about her weight.  She had ended up loathing herself!  After this event, one or two magazines started to change their ways, but still the tendency is to spot the skinny celebrity and how she did it.

Consider what you think about how the media treats celebrities.

Which magazines could be having a negative influence on you and how you perceive your body?

 

A SPECIAL OCCASION

  • Do you have a holiday coming up?
  • Are you going to a friend or a relative’s wedding?
  • Are you going to be the mother of the bride?

So you want to lose weight for that.  Do you really think so? Because if you are only losing the weight for the holiday bikini then you will most likely soon put it back on again. If you buy an outfit for the wedding, lose the weight, look and feel your best after a lot of starvation and then put it all on again, would you consider that to be a waste of time and money? The outfit worn only once ends up at the back of the wardrobe!

Consider how many times you have done this, or know someone who has.

 

YOUR OWN WEDDING

You really want to lose weight so that you will look your best on the big day, which is understandable, and many people do it. But my observation is this; time and time again, the bride or groom or even both go on a diet.  They may even join a slimming club to do it.

They get down to the desired weight, and they walk down the aisle looking their very best. Then when the reception starts, it is time to let their hair down, and all thoughts of the diet are put into the past, and forgotten.  It doesn’t matter anymore; they achieved their goal for the day so now it’s time to eat, drink and be merry.  The diet is over and within a matter of days the weight starts to go back on and within weeks they are right back to where they started before the diet!

Why do people do this?  After all, the couple loved one another enough to decide to get married before the diet!  They then decided that they really needed to change.  They needed to look better than they already did.  So in order to commit to each other they needed to look different?

That one day as a slim person was good.  They looked good.  They were slim. But suddenly once they were married it didn’t matter. By losing that weight, they lowered their metabolism. Their bodies went into famine mode and started to preserve every little bit of fat, and from the wedding onwards it is downhill all the way!  They have got themselves into a lifetime of struggling with their weight for the sake of one day!

What are your thoughts about this?

  • Have you or someone you know ever lost weight for their wedding?
  • How successful were they and did they keep the weight off afterwards?
  • What excuses did they have if they put it back on?
  • Do you consider that it was worth it?
  • Are you thinking of losing weight for your own wedding? If so, maybe you could consider what I have just said and decide that this won’t be just another diet, but will be a change of

 

MODELLING OR DANCING.

Many people in these professions are living on starvation diets.  They strive to be an unrealistic weight, which can lead them to becoming emaciated.  Models have become so thin that they seem to look all skin and bones. Eating disorders such as Anorexia and Bulimia are very common within these professions.

Have you or someone you know been in danger of doing this?

In these cases, many people need professional help.

What are your thoughts about this?

 

 

YOU ARE OBESE OR REALLY OVERWEIGHT

Now we come to the people who really need to lose weight.  They are obese or overweight more than the odd stone.  They may have already been diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes.  Perhaps they may have had a heart attack or some other heart problem.

Or they might have got to the point where getting about is very difficult.  Seats on public transport are getting too small, or they cannot walk very well.  Their joints are playing up and painful.

These people have a vast choice in how they are going to do it.  There are so many diets around that they just do not know where to start.  Each diet is giving them different information.

The magazines feature people who have lost the weight, and they look terrific!  I featured in one myself and had a wonderful day having a makeover and being pampered for the photo shoot, and it made me feel fantastic!

Bookshops and the internet abound with different diets.  Headlines in the paper scream at you. Special editions include a new diet.  But most of them are just a different version of a low calorie regime.

Whichever diet you choose, if you survive beyond the first few days and stick to it strictly, and it is your first diet, you will lose weight.  You may lose 10% of the weight you want; you may lose it all.  If you do get close to your goal, you may find losing the last few pounds just as big a struggle as the whole diet put together.

If you are with a slimming club, you may, as I have a few times, have the members cheering and clapping when you can shout “I’ve done it!”  It’s a great feeling!  Then the leader hands you your badge and explains the maintenance programme, and so begins the struggle to keep the weight off!

However, it is well known that 98% of people who lose weight this way put it back on again and many people put on even more than they have lost. I don’t want to play devil’s advocate here for those who are perhaps already struggling with losing weight on a diet, but you may want to think about what you are going to do when you reach your goal.

I am not saying at this point that you should abandon what you are doing. Just consider what you are doing is for life, and use the thoughts in this book to help you to map it out.

Find a way of eating that will be for life and not just to lose weight.

Remember the statistics say that 98% of people who lose weight, put it back on again and more besides.

This is because they are not adopting a new lifestyle and way of eating and the way that they think!  This is worth repeating.

  • Think about your plans to keep the weight off, once you have lost it.
  • Read and research to find out what you will think would suit you if you could choose how to do this.
  • This book will give you a framework to make a start on designing a diet for life.

 

POST BABY FAT

Women are designed to have babies!  Even if they do not want a baby by choice or cannot have them for some reason, women’s bodies have all the biological necessities for reproduction.  Even before you conceive, your body prepares itself every month, just in case.

Women’s hips are wider than men’s.  Her thighs are thicker.  (That is why you will find that if you try to wear men’s jeans the waist is disproportionate to the hips and thighs.)

Her fat storage system is different; that is why men lose weight more easily than women.

When she has given birth, she is expected in nature to breastfeed the baby.  So she preserves her fat and needs nourishing foods to do that.

The womb takes six weeks to revert to its nearly normal size.  She has flabby skin around the abdominal area, which if she is lucky or works out at the gym will gradually retract back and leave her with a reasonably flat stomach. But most women find it very difficult and may not ever get that flat stomach back.  So what do women do?

A lot of them put up with it, because they are too busy or tired to do anything about it, which is natural.

Or they go on a restrictive slimming diet!

Consequently, they are not getting the proper nourishment that their body needs at this time. Often they just give up and stuff themselves with takeaways or whatever they can get their hands on!

Women can end up feeling that somehow there is something wrong with them, when they see celebrities getting their figures back within a very short time.  They fret and worry and talk endlessly about getting to the gym to get back in shape.  Why?

I wonder if it is because they are trying to live up to a higher standard than nature intends.  If she eats properly with good, nourishing, real food, she will find that she is nourishing the baby properly, and herself and her family.  She won’t have to join a gym for weight loss, although she may want to tone up!  She certainly will not do all this on crisps and takeaways!

But she will stand a better chance of gradually toning up and being healthy if she does not go onto a restrictive calorie counted diet.

  • If you have recently had a baby and are struggling with this, what ideas have you had to lose weight?
  • Do you have a plan for healthy eating?

 

 

AFTER ILLNESS OR SURGERY

Due to lack of mobility, boredom or just people bringing them too many chocolates, people often lose weight at first during an illness or after surgery and then proceed to put it back on and more besides.

Women who have had a hysterectomy often put weight on due to hormones being disrupted and causing depression, but more often than not it is because of eating comfort foods and because of boredom. However, if it is just the hormones then the amount of weight increase should be no more than about 5 lbs.

This can apply to any weight gain when hormones are involved, including taking the contraceptive pill.  Many people who are grossly overweight will blame the fact that they are on the pill.  But the difference is really only a few pounds.

I’m afraid that the rest is because of what they eat, which is more than likely processed, refined carbohydrate.

Take an honest look at the reasons why you think you may have put on weight if you have suffered from an illness or disability.

 

I JUST WANT TO HAVE A FLAT BELLY.

Nature designed women to be rounded. Only fifty years ago, Marilyn Monroe was hailed as a star.  She would be referred to as a celebrity in modern times, but Marilyn was outstanding.  The reason for this was her figure, of full breasts, narrow waist, wide hips, and a rounded belly.

What was referred to as an hour glass figure.

She was the equivalent of a size fourteen these days.

Not that we have to put up with a bulging belly, but we were not designed to have the flat belly that we seem to think we should have!

Now, fifty years later women have become famous for being the opposite.  They want to look boyish, and they want to “choose” how to look.  Fighting against what nature designed them to be.  If they have big breasts, they want small ones, or if they have small breasts, they want big ones.  They certainly do not want a rounded belly!

The Oxford Companion to the Body, which can be found on the internet, talks about the extremes that people go to, to change their body shape.  Extreme dieting leads on to Eating disorders.

Plastic surgery is used to the ultimate degree, not only changing noses or face lifts, but tummy tucks, thigh tucks and so on.  Millions of pounds and dollars are spent on trying to look good.

There is more and more discontent with the way we look.  Some older celebrities look hideous as they attempt to hold back time.

Although much of this reading is directed towards women, men reading this can read between the lines and see where it can apply to them too. Men of course need to look at their belly, as that is where they generally store their fat. .

Many of us have lost the ability to accept our bodies and images for what they are.  Society is obsessed with being thin.  Lives are dominated by diets, what to eat and what not to eat.

Yet we are still in the midst of an Obesity Epidemic!

We have wandered far away from being natural humans.  Our stores are full of junk food.  Our bodies are unacceptable.  We need to get back nearer to what nature provided for us.  With both our body image and with what we eat!

We need to celebrate our bodies, not keep fighting them!

  • Which parts of your body would you change if you could?
  • Consider carefully whether you are being completely realistic?
  • Stand in front of the mirror and look at them one at a time and consider whether any of them could be changed in a natural way.

 

I have also decided to add in another factor for older women.

 

As our body grows older, there is no doubt that it will do everything it can to preserve itself.

The Primal need in our bodies will save and store as much fat as it can and as we get older and the body begins to break down, that will happen all the more.

Therefore, if you are over the age of about sixty, you may need to settle for a slightly higher weight than your mind is telling you to be.

There is a lot of evidence now that being overweight, (not obese) is healthy. See this link, but also research it on google. https://www.sciencealert.com/the-healthiest-weight-might-actually-be-overweight-massive-study-finds

So from that we can conclude that we have been led up the wrong path with NHS guidelines saying that we must be below 25 to be healthy.

The same can be said of our cholesterol levels. We do not need to constantly concerned about keep them low. But that is another matter, although it does give us some indication about how we have all been like sheep and led astray as far as our health is concerned.

So, while considering whether you really need to be constantly worried about losing fat, add this latest thought to your list.

Don’t!

This message seems to be the mantra of our everyday lives. What is left I wonder?

Don’t; eat meat; eat wheat; use straws; use plastic cups or bottles; eat saturated fat; use glitter coffins; use paper; be buried in a council cemetry; eat anything unless its organic; eat processed foods; eat dairy; eat too much; drink alcohol; eat sugar; take too many supplements; take drugs even as medication; use fresh air sprays; eat too much carbohydrate; eat too much protein; be vaccinated; vaccinate your kids; have chemotherapy treatment; use any product that comes packaged in plastic; buy from Amazon; use a kindle; throw anything in the bin that can be recycled; drink bottled water; eat fish from the contaminated sea; and on and on and on.

Let’s all go back to the start of the twentieth century when we used to dream of the utopia of the future with all the things above as just a thought!

But all we have done is transferred our fear onto other things eh?

I wonder what this woman would have thought of us today? Nuff said!

 

We still live in a beautiful world and I am so grateful that I can only do my best to keep it that way.

Statins.

In the light of more news coming out about the Cholesterol and Statin conundrum, let me tell you a story.

Seven years ago, I found out that I have what the NHS considers to be high Cholesterol. 11.5  I was put on statins, and very quickly began to have such bad side effects that I had to leave them off.

Then, the GP sent me to the Lipid Clinic. I felt humiliated and angry to start with when a young student interviewed me to find out my background. She said that I was over the safe limit on the BMI table, (27) and that I had better do something about it. She was supposed to be asking me about my lifestyle, but never asked whether I had been “Doing Something About It!”

I had been doing something about it all of my life, and was feeling great that I was still only 27 on the BMI table!  So you can imagine my anger. But that is another story.

However, the Lipid Consultant gave me some other drugs than statins, which I took. When I went back four weeks later, my Cholesterol had gone down. So she then gave me an added drug. To this day I cannot understand why she did that if the other one was working anyway. In my ignorance, I began to take them.

By now I was beginning to do a lot of research of my own. And discovered that this drug had NOT BEEN ENTIRELY PROVED TO BE SAFE!

The rest of the story, in brief, was that I wrote to the consultant, discussed it with my GP, (who was very open-minded) and left all the drugs off.

I had read two books which I highly recommend to you, and which the consultant said that she would be putting in an official complaint about the authors because they were damaging peoples health! She was bringing my case up at the conference she was attending on Heart research, and she was writing to my GP with a disclaimer notice.

My GP laughed when I went to her next, and put my head around the door before my body,  and asked if it was safe to come in, seeing as she had had this letter from said Consultant. But she said that she had already written back to the consultant saying that her patient (me) had obviously done a lot of research and that she was entitled to make up her own mind.

Since then, my readings have gone down to 7.5 which is about right for someone my age. Without any drugs, but eating a balanced diet and NOT LOW FAT.

So, before you carry on believing all that is said about having to keep your Cholesterol Levels down, far too low for many of us, read these books. I don’t claim to be an expert, but I know enough to realise that I am a lot better off letting my body do as it thinks best.

The books that I read were The Great Cholesterol Con, by Dr Malcom Kendrick, whom I have now met and he gave me a signed copy in honour of the way that I stood up to these medical bullies. His book is informative, easy reading and funny in a tongue in cheek fashion.

 

And Ignore the Awkward, by Uffe Ravnskov

A New Relationship With Food.

Food Altar

My new relationship with food.

Many of you will know that I see myself as an expert on food issues and addictions to certain food.

I have written books about it and numerous blogs and even designed a workbook to help people. A lot of my work has been entitled around “What does food mean to you?”

I am an expert because I have been obsessed with food and weight issues for nearly fifty years. And that means that an awful lot of calories, pounds and food has passed my lips.

My bulimia has been anything from living on virtually nothing to eating an entire loaf of bread spread with butter and jam in an afternoon.

Seven years ago, I came across a diet that made sense to me. This way of eating helped me to break away from sugar and carbohydrate addiction, by controlling my intake of those foods.

But, it was all coming from the outside; in. Even though this diet made sense, and there was loads of support, conferences and a forum. As well as the books, recipes and menus, seven years later I have still fallen back occasionally to the old ways. I have still fallen back into the habit of being obsessed with my body weight.

In the last seven years too, I have been working on my personal and spiritual self. It has been quite a trip.

In fact, when I sometimes read the stuff that I have written, I wonder if it was me that wrote it. But at present, I seem to be in a phase where I am catching up with my own advice.

In the last two months, I have been reading, learning, studying and practising with a chap called Dr Joe Dispenza. He has written several books, but I started with one called “Breaking the Habit of Being You.”

He explains that no matter how hard we try if we don’t change our thinking and core beliefs about ourselves, we cannot change the ingrained habits of our way of thinking.

Changing our thinking has been talked about over the years, in connection with Spiritual development. We hear about the Law of Attraction, Quantum theory and the laws of the Universe.

Yet all of these will not work completely unless we are willing to meet them halfway. This can be with illness, lack, addictions, broken relationships, and so on.

JD has gone a step further and explained HOW we could change our thinking, by changing our brains.

When I started to read his books, I became aware of the large amount of headspace my food issues was filling up. I had often tried to change my thinking around several shifts that I have wanted to make in my life. But somehow there has been something lacking.

For me and countless others, Joe has hit the proverbial nail on the head.

If you want to know more, you would have to listen to him on YouTube or read his books. But basically, he works on using the brain, body and mind together, by meditation. Choosing what you want to change, you then do the meditation, and state your intention.

He explains in details why it works, and at his seminars and workshops, you can see the activity in the brain, on the EEG machines that he uses. It is all carried out scientifically and not just pseudoscience.

So, I began carrying out his instructions, and now, two months later I am finding that my attitude to food is changing dramatically.

For example, I am now eating a lot less and satisfied quicker. I am enjoying my food, and am not afraid of it anymore. When fear sets in I simply say the word “Change.”  Doing this brings my awareness to what I am doing and why. I am no longer in the fridge or cupboard wondering what to eat between meals.

I am bringing foods into the house that I would not have before. Yes, there is still a way to go with that because there are still some foods that I fear will bring on a binge. But that will change with continual everyday meditation and choose to use the word change when I find myself in the food cupboard, and I am not hungry.

Most surprising is that I find that given a choice between eating what I know is good for me, and some other food that I have banned from my diet in the past, I am actually choosing the good food.

I surrendered my anxiety over what I eat because I was still in a kind of diet trap. I was still using the diet to control me, instead of allowing my body to say what it wants.

There are probably people who are thinking, “If I did that I would be totally out of control because the sugar would trigger me off.”

I was saying that too until I decided that I wanted to change enough to make a difference in my life. In the past, I would have been afraid to let go, because the addiction was controlling me.

But now I realise that I want to have dominion over my body.  Which has not meant that I am dictating to it what it has, but because I am also respecting its needs, my body is responding with “Thank you for listening to me, I can now let you know what I want!”

And rewarding me for making me aware of the times when if I fancy something sweet, I can have it. Without the fear of losing control.

For many years I have been cooking separate meals for myself and my husband. I still do occasionally, because there are some things that he likes that I don’t.

But there have too many occasions when I have cooked separate meals, and simply do not want mine, and yet would fancy his. It dawned on me that perhaps I would be healthier if I had a little of what I have cooked for him rather than sitting down to something I don’t fancy. Why go on torturing myself, because I am afraid of food!

People with weight, self-image and food problems, have a complicated relationship with food. I have been telling myself all those years that I love food. But the constant input from various diets and slimming clubs has made me afraid of it.

We hear so much about what is good for you, or what is not so good. The media bring mixed messages to people, no wonder we get confused.

We all need to eat. We need to eat nourishing foods and enjoy them. Above all, we need “Soul Food!”

That means that we need to nourish our mind, body and soul. Eating out with friends is a good example of that. Are you eating out with them because of the food, or because of their company?

When I have been not eating particular foods in the past, I have felt almost cast aside. Now I can just eat a little of what the others eat and just be seen as having a small appetite.

Are you eating something that has been slung together for the sake of satisfying your physical hunger? Or are you eating something that has been lovingly prepared?

Yes, there are times when we are in a hurry and may turn to some fast food. But that does not mean that it cannot be nourishing.

However, I digress. The point is that I have realised a wonderful change in my attitude to food and my body since I began the meditations with Joe. It is not Joe that is making the difference, but my intention of making the change. He simply gave me the tools.

I am making good use of those tools, I know that I have a way to go, fifty years of dieting and not eating certain foods, will not be changed overnight. But the important thing is that I am now aware of what the problem has been.

If you are stuck in any area of your life and want to change it, whether that is lack, addiction, or an illness, take a look at Joe Dispenza. I am aware that he is not the only person teaching quantum, but his teachings have hit the spot for me.

Joe Dispenza has written, “Evolve the Brain.”  “Breaking the Habit of Being You.” “The Placebo Effect”.

Recently he wrote “Becoming Supernatural”, and he is touring the world presenting a workshop on it. I am looking forward to attending his London workshop on April 14th. 2018.

 

 

 

 

The Power of Choice.

Choice is the thing you fear the most, yet do the most.

 

On Saturday, February 24th I attended a talk by Caroline Myss in London UK.

Many people have asked me to tell them about it. So I have squeezed Caroline’s 5-hour teaching into this five-minute blog. Take the five minutes to read it, and then find out more about her teachings, if you want to know more by going to her Website. https://www.myss.com.

The Workshop in London was; Power Choices: How to Make Creative Decisions in Times of Chaos and Possibilities.

Are we operating from the inside out or outside in? Are we reading the books and putting them on the shelf and moving onto the next one, but never taking any action.

It is a privilege to be alive at this time of change.

Caroline always illustrates our consciousness and growth like a multi-storey building. When you are on the ground floor, the view is completely different from the Penthouse. You can have the same address. But you seem to live in a different place because you cannot see very far.

Getting to the top floor requires a journey and succeeding comes from our choices. We are led to believe that living in the penthouse would result from having money, luck or being the CEO of a top firm. And many of us use lack of those things or our past to stop us from moving up.

The Law of life is that all things are moving.

The nuclear age brought about a new world, in attitude, behaviour, evolution,  and how we experience time. We used to wait for things and save for them, but now we want it instantly.

We are educated to use the five senses. Hearing, seeing, smelling, taste and touch. But there is more than that. But that is a misrepresentation. We also have emotional, spiritual and intellectual senses and sacred intellect. Every time you make a decision you use these other senses bringing us to balance. The whole system kicks in to keep this balance.

When you are craving something for example, it tells you that something is seriously out of whack. Your choice is based on the whole BIO system, and you are having a consultation with your intuitive self. You know you should not give in, so you have a conversation with yourself. (She made us laugh at that point by admitting that she has a craving for sugar. That is what I like about Caroline, she owns up to her own humanity.)

Ask; Why do I want it? Guidance. When you make a choice, you are choosing to distribute the energy of your energetic being. You are made of energy.

Power play comes into it too. How many times do we use  “Shudda, wudda, cudda?”

We blame others for our hurts, but ask yourself; “How many are in therapy because of me?”

Do we have a script in life? What do we expect from others? Do we believe that we deserve? What do others expect of us?

Do we expect others to; be nice, use your manners, don’t speak to me like that etc.

Where am I anchored from my past? What do I believe I am entitled to?

The feeling of being entitled to something uses a lot of energy. Who says that we are entitled to something?

What are my current fears that drive my choices?

Your intuitive system will tell you what to do. Gut, heart and so on. But we run past that to our wounded history. Then we end up doing nothing because we are anchored to our past.

We turn to healers, teachers, books, learning, seminar’s and so on. Crystals, acupuncture, Reiki and on and on, but it is your own energy holding you back. We need to meet it halfway for it to work.

The immune systems collectively and individually are breaking down.  Metabolic diseases, chronic fatigue, cancer etc. because people are stressed and cannot wait for things. We used to save for material possession’s, but now we want them instantly.

We are in transition of the nature of God, but we are still subject to the Universal Laws.Galaxy

We have taken on collective moral responsibility; it’s not safe out there.

We think that we are entitled to things, or we deserve them.

But we need to not rely on fear, money and power or being famous; we need to respect ourselves and stop betraying ourselves. Tell the truth as you know it. Use the intuition that you know you have.

We also need to be aware of the power of our words. There are words that have been dropped from our modern day vocabulary, such as God, sin, conscience. Why? Because they are not considered to be productive; our souls are not valued anymore.

When you make decisions so much depends on whether you want your life to change. Are you a choice maker, a victim or is it someone else’s fault?

No one else can do something for you. Stop telling yourself fictional stories.

“I’m going to write a book.”

“I’m thinking about moving house.”

“I’m thinking of changing jobs.”

Complaining can become a hobby. Talking about it can also become a pastime when you do not move.

Either stay with your disempowerment and stop talking about it or go with the empowerment.

You are being called to help, be courageous- be collective – but don’t make it about you. The world is changing and becoming a global community.

But you are only one tiny part of the whole. You are part of the mystical consciousness. What is the one part is in the whole. A statement, not a question.  Wars and strife are caused because so many people do not want change.

People just don’t like change, every time there is change there is an uprising.

When we use the word energy, we mean grace. The word energy by itself will not heal. Use words that get you to a higher place. Such as devotion, prayer, belief, and most of all grace.

Never use another person’s name for your choices in life, the only person occupying your body is YOU. Don’t use phrases such as “But she said…..Or he thinks………”

How we age and deal with our health and healing depends on the words that we use.

With Quantum, science became invisible. Atoms, particles, energetic particles etc. The world we were taught about does not exist anymore. What we know now is the world of energy; not matter.

We feel we know God because it does not exist outside of us anymore, it is the Cosmos.  The Truth.  “I am one with everything. One huge breath. You breathe it, you create it, all one. All oneness; One big huge!”

I FEEL THE FLOW OF NATURE AND NATURE ALWAYS BRINGS ME BACK TO BALANCE. THAT’S LAW.  THAT’S GOD.

When you make a choice, ask yourself “Will it bring me back to balance? Your gut and your heart and your throat will tell you.

Organic Theology!

Humble up. Pride will always get you into trouble. Edit your little book of expectations.

You don’t deserve anything. Don’t make any decisions under the guise of “I deserve it.”  Don’t buy, don’t eat, don’t do it just because you think you deserve it.

Start small with your goals. Don’t try to get to the top of the mountain before you try the bottom few slopes.

“Why am I here?” is a prayer. Just the same with; “ What am I doing here?” “What do you want of me?”

Let’s look at The Dark Night of the Soul, first described by John of the Cross in the sixteenth century.

The Night is a three-part journey. Firstly, look at all the things that didn’t turn out as you wanted them to be, or what “was done” to you? The course of anger and depression has turned inward.

Here, Caroline told us the story of a bad nose bleed in which she was hospitalised and had to have transfusions, after an awful betrayal. She was enraged, and the loss of blood was the symbolic energy of the betrayal; A Dark Night. Our suffering is about how we deal with the experience.

Secondly, there is the Illumination stage. There is power in pain. It keeps our control over others. She talks about that in her book “Why People Don’t heal”. We can consciously choose to stay wounded.

Take your eyes off everyone else and purge yourself, your agenda and your ego. By choosing to heal or change, everything in your life will change.

God is consistent; you will rise again like a phoenix from the ashes.

Thirdly, during the Dark Night of the soul, there will come a time when joy comes knocking at your door. God built life that way, Spring after Winter.  Trust it. There is nothing personal about your life – move onto the higher truth. You are not special. Follow the path of being ordinary. Ordinary; is knowing the path of nature – the laws – the mystical – Prayer.

And how do you pray? Where is the connection when making a choice? When it is a significant one that has a profound effect on you and others; do not look back. The world you were in before making that choice is gone.

Talk to someone about it, a sacred counsel, not an opinion. Counsel should come from someone who is being transcendent in their wisdom. One who does not have an agenda.

When you pray say the words; Do not let me make a wrong choice.

Imagine a bridge. The world you are coming from is behind you and the world before you is the choice you make. When you reach the other side of the bridge having made that choice do not ask yourself if it was the wrong one. Don’t second guess yourself.

Become observant of your vocabulary. How you talk, what you say and the words you use.

Put yourself to bed with faith, not fear. Get your eyes off what others are saying and the way they are looking at you.

We came away feeling refreshed, enlightened and entertained. Caroline is so funny with her descriptions and illustrations of every day life as a human. A brilliant teacher and modern day mystic. She calls herself a mystic without a mansion. But we were aware that we need to practice what she preached, and not just tuck it all away on the proverbial shelf.